As the children, teens, and adults in our lives come with questions, we need to give answers that are honest and rooted in compassion. I see compassion as a love for truth, not a lust for self-righteousness. When faced with difficult questions, it is perfectly okay to say, "I don't know," or "I will find out." It will be the way we live our lives, our sincerity, compassion, and desire for truth that will stick in the minds of our children.

Since individuals enter into vegetarian ideals through many different doors, it is quite impossible for any one of us to have all of the answers. Many people first choose the diet for its disease prevention or management, weight control, or enhanced athletic performance qualities. Some answer the call to help preserve the environment, or try to prevent human starvation by adopting a plant-based diet. A growing number of activists have begun to make economic decisions based upon ethical considerations, like whether a company utilizes animal products or unfair labor practices. Still others become vegetarian to comply with religious dietary guidelines, or to honor spiritual stewardship commitments. And many have come to the movement to take a stand for the welfare of animals. Finally, many readers of this magazine were fortunate enough to simply be born into a vegetarian family!

Regardless of which door one enters, once through, the reasons for living compassionately become interconnected; they are inextricably linked. Each of us, in our own time and in our own space, becomes aware that the compassion inherent in the vegetarian diet is optimal for the environment, the animals, our neighbors, our spirituality, our families, and our bodies.

But I often think we can do a better job in role modeling compassion to our children, especially when dealing with people whose reasons for becoming a vegetarian differ in any measure from our own. Rynn Berry, historian for the North American Vegetarian Society, once conceptualized the thought process as one feeling "More vegetarian than thou." Perhaps it's the inability to see the beauty of another vegetarian carrying a different part of the same message. Pictures that come to mind include the vegan whispering about the lacto-vegetarian, the religious vegetarian feeling arrogant toward the non-religious vegetarian, or the animal rights activist shunning the health activist. Admittedly, some individuals bring a personal emotional component to the edginess, like strong feelings of frustration, aloneness, desperation, or maybe even anger at recalling one's own abuse in the past. In these cases, I can see value in seeking counseling to help the individual put the negative energy behind and begin to take in positive energy, so that personal issues do not remain as stumbling blocks in the ability to communicate. Most of the time, however, I believe these behaviors toward others arise from the simple desire for everyone to be 'on the same page at the same time.'

But the bottom line is that our children, in their purity and innocence, see this silent or verbal violence. These types of behaviors can also escalate to in-fighting, keeping the energy of our movement at a dispersed trickle, rather than allowing us to realize our potential to sweep up the nation in a raging river. Could we - messengers of compassion - in an ironic twist, have been our own worst enemy for years?

Compassionate and respectful treatment of others is, by definition, relevant to any angle of vegetarianism. Whether we are teaching our children a new angle of compassion, reaching out to another vegetarian, or planting a seed with a 'meat-eater,' we need to remember reality. We are each on a different path, with different seeds of wisdom to share at different times, with different people, and in different places. We need to remain mindful that the true power is in the entire message of vegetarianism, not in any one cause or in any one of us standing alone on a soapbox. To realize this is to know that we are each a part of an amazing truth, and we each have a different part of the story to tell. After all, truth and compassion are two of the best gifts we can give to our children.

--Dr. Kerrie Saunders has a regular column in Vegetarian Baby and Child magazine entitled "Seeds of Change." She is a Master's level psychologist, a Certified Addictions Counselor, a Certified Prevention Consultant, wife, and mother. You can access her multi-media presentation and consultation firm, VeganSpeak, and find her book, The Vegan Diet as Chronic Disease Prevention, and at http://www.VeganSpeak.com.